Bible ~~- Older Testament ~~- 2nd Samuel ~~- chapter 11 of 24 (27 verses.)

2nd Samuel 11Wrench

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Peeping-Tom Warlord David Commits Adultery
1 War A year passes. [Spring blooms. Various] kings [march] out to battle. So [king] David deploys [General] Joab {JAH-Dad}. [Joab's] deputies and all [the warriors of] Israel [trail behind Joab. They march east past the Jordan river.] They destroy the [inbred] spawn of Ammon. They besiege Rabbah {Plenty}. Meanwhile, David stays in Jerusalem.
2 Lust *Then, one sunset, [sleepless] David {Lover} gets up off his [giant] bed. He [stalks up to] the royal palace's rooftop [veranda]. Walking there, he sees a woman bathing herself. [David won't stop staring, because] she's so hot looking.
3 Adultery So [king] David sends [a messenger] to ask if the woman is [willing to come bed him]. One [of the woman's neighbors] says, โ€œI think that's Eliam's daughter Bath-Sheba {Oath-Daughter}. She's the wife of UriYah {YAH's-Flame} the Hittite {Son-Of-Terror}.โ€
4 Adultery *[Ignoring the neighbor lady's good advice, king] David sends messengers to get [his warrior's wife]. So [Bath-Sheba] comes to [David]. [He finds out that] she's cleaned-up from her period. So he beds her. Then she returns to her house.
David is more concerned about ritual law than moral law. Punctilious about Lev 5:18 while violating the 7th commandment! Various visualizations of this event:
  • She wants to diddle the king. She baited him by bathing outside in his plain view.
  • Or she's hesitant, but he woos her.
  • Or she's resistant, but he forces her.
  • She should have refused.

    5 Adultery *[Bath-Sheba] conceives. So she sends [a messenger to the palace. He delivers her secret message] to David, โ€œI'm with-child.โ€
    She seeks David's protection because she violated Lev 20:10.
    6 Adultery So [king] David sends [a messenger east across the Jordan river] to [General] Joab {JAH-Dad} [at the battlefield]: โ€œSend me UriYah {YAH's-Flame} the Hittite {Son-Of-Terror}.โ€ So Joab sends UriYah [back home] to David.
    7 Adultery UriYah {YAH's-Flame} runs to [David's throne room]. [King] David asks, โ€œHow's [General] Joab doing? โ€ฆ How's the [army] surviving? โ€ฆ How's the war going?โ€
    8 Adultery [David doesn't even listen to Uriyah's answer.] David says to UriYah {YAH's-Flame}, โ€œGo down to your house. Wash your โ€˜feet.โ€™โ€ [Meaning, โ€œGet cleaned up and bed your wife.โ€] So UriYah leaves the royal palace. [A trail of David's servants follow UriYah. They carry] royal food for [Uriyah and his wife to enjoy].
    9 Moral Purity / Childlikeness *But instead of going back home to his house [to sleep with his wife,] UriYah {YAH's-Flame} sleeps at the royal palace gate beside [king David's royal] guard!
    10 Adultery [King] David's [spies] report to him, โ€œUriYah didn't go down to his house.โ€ So David [stomps down from his chambers. He] asks UriYah, โ€œDidn't you [just] come from a long journey? Why didn't you go down to your house?โ€
    11 Integrity *UriYah {YAH's-Flame} answers [king] David, โ€œ[YAH's] ark, and [the soldiers of north] Israel and Judea, [sleep] in war-tents. My master [General] Joab {JAH-Dad}, and [his commanders], are camping in the [enemy's] open fields. So how could I go into my house, to eat and drink, and lie with my wife? As you live, and while you [draw] breath, I won't [enjoy a night with my wife until all my fellow soldiers come home]!โ€
    12 Adultery [King] David answers UriYah {YAH's-Flame}, โ€œWait here today. Then tomorrow I'll let you go [back to battle].โ€ So UriYah stays in Jerusalem that day and the next.
    13 Adultery [The next day, king] David summons [UriYah]. [David] feeds him royal food and gets him drunk [on wine]. But that night [UriYah] staggers back down to lie on [a cot] beside the soldiers of commander [Joab,] instead of going to his house [to sleep with his wife, Bath-Sheba]!
    King David Kills His Pregnant Lover's Husband
    14 Murder So the [next] morning, [king] David writes a letter to [General] Joab {JAH-Dad}. [David] sends [the letter east] by the hand of UriYah {YAH's-Flame}.
    15 Murder *[David writes these] words in the letter: โ€œSet UriYah {YAH's-Flame} in the forefront of the hottest battle. Then retreat from him until the [enemy] strikes him dead.โ€
    16 Murder *So [general] Joab {JAH-Dad} looks [up] at the [flaming] city. He sends UriYah {YAH's-Flame} to a place where he knows the [most] valiant [Jew-hating enemies are fighting].
    17 Murder *Then the men of the [pagan] city rush out. They attack Joab's men. The [pagans] kill some of David's deputies. UriYah {YAH's-Flame} the Hittite dies [with them].
    18 War Then [General] Joab {JAH-Dad} sends [messengers west to Jerusalem's palace]. They tell [king] David all the news from the war.
    19 Adultery [Joab] commands the messenger, โ€œTell all the news of the war to king [David];
    20 Adultery โ€”Then the king's fire-rage may flame up. He [might scream at] you, โ€˜Why did you advance so close to the city when you fought? Didn't you know the [enemy] would shoot [you] from the wall?
    21 Murder โ€”Who struck [ancient] AbiMelech {Father-King} (the son of Jerubbesheth {Idol-Wrangler})? Didn't a woman cast a piece of a millstone on him from the wall, so that he died in Tevetz {Bleached-White}? [Yes!] So why did you [storm] the wall?โ€™ Then you'll answer, โ€˜Your servant UriYah {YAH's-Flame} the Hittite also died.โ€™โ€
    22 Murder So the messenger [rides away west from the battlefield to Jerusalem, to the palace]. He runs [into the throne-room]. He presents [to king] David the [messages General] Joab {JAH-Dad} sent him to [deliver].
    23 War The messenger says to [king] David, โ€œThe [pagans] totally overpowered our [army]. The [infidels] rushed out to [attack] us in the field while we were storming their city gate.
    24 War The [enemy] archers shot [arrows down] from their [fortress] wall. [They murdered many of us,] your servants. Some of [your] royal deputies diedโ€ฆ And your servant UriYah {YAH's-Flame} the Hittite died.โ€ [The messenger winces, bracing for the impact of king David's wrath.]
    25 Murder [King] David answers the messenger, โ€œSay this to Joab {JAH-Dad}, โ€˜Don't let this [setback] displease you. For the sword devours one as well as another. Strengthen your attack against the city. Overthrow it.โ€™ Encourage [General Joab].โ€
    David Marries The Wife Of His Murder Victim
    26 Murder [Soon Bath-Sheba,] the wife of UriYah {YAH's-Flame}, hears that her husband lies dead, ๐Ÿ˜‡. She mourns her [lost] soul-mate.
    27 Adultery *[BathSheba's] mourning period passes. [King] David sends [soldiers] to bring her to his palace. She becomes his wife. [8 months later,] she bears him a son. But YHVH eyes [king] David's [murderous adultery with] rage, ๐Ÿ˜‡!
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