Bible ~~- Older Testament ~~- Ezekiel ~~- chapter 4 of 48 (17 verses.)

Ezekiel 4Wrench

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Ezekiel Foretells The Siege of Jerusalem
1 Art Then, โ€˜son of Adamโ€™, take a clay slab. Lay it before your face. On it, draw the city of Jerusalem.
Babylonian inscription-bricks measure 14"x12" (inches). Again, so much for the bogus theory that Moses forbade representational drawing.
2 Art *Then [pretend to surround and] attack [your drawing of Jerusalem]. Build [scale models of] siege-towers with catapults [pelting the city]. Build a ramp up to it. Erect war-camps facing it. Surround it with [models of] battering-rams.
Performance art.
3 Missions/Outreach *Then get an iron plate. Place it like an iron wall between you and the [model] city. Fix your gaze on it. [Mimic] the siege, with you as the attacker. This will serve as a [warning] sign to the house of Israel.
4 Art Then lay down on your left side. On your torso, place [the destroyed city-model representing] the ruinous house of Israel. Lay there every day for [390 days. Symbolically] bear Israel's [perversity].
Ezekiel may have lain there only part of each day.
5 Education I'm assigning you 390 days of [discomfort and public ridicule]. You'll bear one day for each of the 390 years the house of Israel [has wallowed in] evil.
390 years may refer to when rebel north Israel, led by king Stink (Bashaa), led his civil war on Judea.
6 Missions/Outreach When you finish the [390 days,] then lie on your right side for 40 days to symbolically bear the ruin of the house of Judah {Celebrated}. I'm sentencing you to 1 day [of suffering] per year of Judah's [recent apostasy].
40 years earlier, Judah's evil king Jehoiakim burned the scroll of another prophet: Jeremiah.
7 Art Set your face toward [your model] siege of Jerusalem. Bare your arm. Foretell [Judea's] doom.
8 Art Then watch: I'll [supernaturally] tie you with ropes so you can't turn from one side to the other. [I'll do this every day] until you've ended the [430] days of your [mock] siege.
Or the less surreal: โ€˜I'm commanding you to get tied up with ropes...โ€™
9 Healthy Food Now go and get some wheat, barley, beans, lentils, millet and spelt. Mix them together in a storage jar. Use this food to make bread for yourself to eat during the 390 days you'll be lying on your side.
This is the Ezekiel bread recipe, said to be very healthy.
10 Healthy Food Weigh out 8 ounces of food per day. Eat it in timed rations throughout the day.
Perhaps 12 ounces.
11 Art Also ration your drinking water to 2/3 quart per day. Sip it from time to time.
A gallon a day is more healthy, but this is performance art, not health advice.
12 Art Eat [your bread] like [you'd eat] barley cakes. Bake it in the [people's] sight. Use [dried] human poop [as fuel].โ€
13 War [I jolt in shock, ๐Ÿ˜‡.] YHVH continues, โ€œ[Human-dung-fuel] is exactly how the โ€˜sons of Israelโ€™ come to eat their defiled food among the beast-nations where I [soon] drive them.โ€
14 Healthy Food *Then I reply, โ€œOh Adonai YHVH! Look: my body has never been contaminated. From my youth up to right now I've never eaten any [animal] that died by itself or that [beasts] tore to pieces. No disgusting [unclean] food has ever entered my mouth!โ€
Zeke wouldn't eat hot-dogs at your church picnic. Ezekiel was not fond of squished-up swine's anus.
15 Healthy Food So [YHVH] answers me, โ€œ[Ok,] look: I'll assign you cow poop instead of human poop as fuel for you to bake bread with.โ€
16 War *Then, ๐Ÿ˜‡, [YHVH] says to me, โ€œโ€˜Son of Adam,โ€™ watch me cut off Jerusalem's bread supply. The [fakes] fall to anxiously eat weight-rationed bread. Shell-shocked, they drink rationed water [in little sips].
17 War Finally, starving for bread and water, they come to stare, [appalled] at each other. [Their malnourished brains rot behind their] stunned [eyes,] wasting away because of their guilt.โ€
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