Troy Joy's Comedy Hits

Dysfunctional Family

Author: Troy Joy Comedy Show
I wake up every morning 'bout 2 or 3 pm
Grab a box of doughnuts and I light my cigarette
and watch my T.V.
Then I eat some more doughnuts

See I'm a victim of the system
Got imbalance in my brain
I'm a slave to my addictions
But I know who to blame
My "picture-perfect" Mother
My workaholic Dad
My overeating grandparents
They screwed me up real bad
I coulda' been famous
But I' got a dysfunctional family

I got psychiatry on Monday
My psychic friend on Tuesday
My Wednesday Meditations
and my daily affirmations
Thursday there's prescriptions
To fix all my afflictions
It'd take my fingers and my toes
to count all my conflictions
I coulda' been RICH!
But I got a dysfunctional family

Friday is my favorite day
I get my Guv'mint check
Mom says work would do me good
but welfare pays the rent
Saturday night I sleep with codependents just like me
Sunday we do penance with the preachers on TV
'cause we're dysfunctional
We grew up in dysfunctional families

Fame and fortune wait for me
My life's gonna change
You're gonna' be amazed when my planets rearrange!
I ain't layin' around ta' wait for lightning to strike me
'cause I'm good enough, I'm smart enough & doggonne it people like me
So love, love love me do
'cause I love you!
I'm good enough for you
'cause you're dysfunctional too!
See Study notes on Dysfunctional Family

FROM Troy Joy's Comedy Hits