Short Story ~~- What Came Out Of My Butt

What Comes Out Of Your Butt

Unhealthy Diet 3206 Characters =~3.2Min. Reading Time
I ate a rock.
Mom died of shock
But that rock dropped out of my butt.

I ate a string.
A funny thing-
the string strung out of my butt.

I ate a ball.
The ball was small.
So the ball bounced out of my butt.

I ate a bone
Man, did I groan
When that bone came out of my butt.

I ate my poo
though Mom said not to
and goo squirted out of my butt.

I ate my snot
and quite a lot
of snot snorted out of my butt.

I ate a toy.
I felt no joy
when the toy came out of my butt.

I ate the grass
Grass too will pass:
Grass passed right out of my butt.

I ate a bug
and on the rug
dropped bug parts
out of my butt.

I ate a worm
Wow! That worm squirmed!
But it turned to goo in my butt.

If you eat ear-plugs
have no fear
ear plugs come out of your butt.

If you eat fruit pits,
it may hurt a bit,
but pits pass out through your butt.

I ate a grasshopper
it flippered and floppered
and came out in bits from my butt.

If you eat marbles
you may choke and die (Your speech will be garbled)
But marbles can pass through your butt.

Though eating erasers
won't please your taste-buds
erasers sail out of your butt.

If you eat a seed
that's not human feed,
the seed comes out of your butt.

If you eat a cap
you might feel a snap
When the (pen) cap snaps [cr*ps) out of your butt.

If you eat a wire
a doctor you'll hire (you'll feel a fire til the wire's cut out of your gut)
to cut the wire out of your gut.

If you eat a swab
it may be a job
to get that swab out of your butt.

If you eat staples
there will be pain
when the staple sticks into your gut -
- It might never come out through your butt.

If you eat a note,
the note just might float
when the note blows out of your butt.

If you eat flies
you'll get sick but not die
cause flies fly out of your butt.

If you eat tacks
you'll get an attack
of pain in your belly and butt.

If you eat Lego's
Soon you'll beg god to
let Lego's pass through your butt.

If you eat cars
you may get some scars
when cars drive out of your butt.

If you eat trucks
the trucks might get stuck
in the mud trucking out of your butt.

If you eat a stick,
it may be a trick
to get that stick out of your butt.

If you eat a drill bit
you might throw a fit
when that (drill) bit bites into your butt.

If you eat your phone
you won't ever call home
with the phone stuck down in your gut.

If you eat a ring
you may feel a sting
when the ring flings out of your butt.

If you eat a card
you may have to push hard
to fart the card out of your butt.

If you eat a key
you'll scream to get free
from the key that's stuck in your gut.

If you eat a nail,
your body may fail
to live with a nail in your gut.

If you eat a snail
you may moan and wail
when the snail crawls out of your butt.

If you eat a screw
you'll die and turn blue
with a screw screwing into your gut.

But if you eat sand,
or dirt from your hand,
then sand will land out of your butt.

So tell Mom not to fret
You're not dead just yet
Cause God pulled a funny stunt:

If you don't choke
when it goes down your throat,
it will most likely pass through your butt.